Stupid People Piss Me Off

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   Posted Dec 24, 2008 - Views: 778

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I think I am going to enjoy plogging this site. I also think it's only fair to admit one's own stupidity, at least if one is going to point it out in others.

This is a story about a late-in-life driver and a set of missing keys. I swear this is 100% true.

I was 42 years old when i learned to drive.  I don't know if that has any bearing on this or not, but it seemed important at the time.

For a year I had a brutal commute that invovled a 30 minute (in good weather) drive to a train station followed by a 15 minute wait (in good weather) for a 90 minute (in good weather) train ride. Real fun. in winter my day started at 4 AM and didn't end until I got home after 7 PM. I was tired much of the time.

I got into a routine on the train ride home. Mine was the last stop on the line. After the second to last stop, I would get out my keys and go stand in the foyer by the doors. This one particular day, I look for and cannot find my keys. I am not duly concerned, because I always carry too sets of keys with me, and my second set is there as expected. But I start thinking, where are my primary set of keys? Did my bag tip over at work (as has happened) and are my keys sitting on the floor under my desk? No, I cannot remember that happening this day.

A worse thought occurs to me, which is that I dropped my keys when I got out of my car that morning. This is not a great neighborhood, next to the trainyard. It is loud there, so I might not have heard them hitting the ground. What if someone found my dropped keys and stole my car? I've had my license for less than two years, and have owned this brand spankin' new car for less than six months. Oh my god, now I'm really starting to panic. I'm wondering if my insurance covers gross negligence such as leaving one's keys on the ground next to one's car.

So I go stand in the train foyer and watch out the window as the train pulls in, holding my breath...closer and closer...and YES OH THANK YOU IMAGINARY GOD, THERE IS MY CAR. Thank you thank you thank you. .

It's late November, it's dark out at 6:30 in the evening, and bitter cold. I look on the ground around my car, but don't see any keys. I get into my car and my first thought is that it must have been warmer than I realized during the day, because the seat isn't totally freezing. I then try to put my key in the ignition, but have trouble doing so. Only then, when I look closely, do I realize the raeson I can't get my key in the because my OTHER key is already in there. My car is running. it has been running all day long.

Probably the only reason no one noticed and stole my car is because of the trainyard noise, which is why I didn't even hear my own car's engine when I got into it that evening. Oh, and if you're interested, it idled away just over half a tank of gas in the 13 hours it sat running in the parking lot.

Anyway, that's probably the most stupid thing I have ever done. Except for the time I accidentally cut off a cop car, sirens, flashing lights and all. But that's another story.

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